5 Perceived Ways of Holding Grudge in Islam

Have you ever feeling something hard in your breath while you just give forgiveness to someone? Maybe that you are not positively giving them your forgiveness. That is why you holding a grudge for them. As long as you hold your grudge, the more hurt you feel.

Holding a grudge is hard to bring and hurt your heart the most. The only way to release it is to let it go. Sometimes to let them go also as hard as we keep hold on it. Still, it is better to let go and giving forgiveness to others. In the Quran surah, Al Maidah verse 13 says that:

 فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاصْفَحْ ۗاِنَّ اللّٰهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُحْسِنِيْنَ – ١٣

“… then forgive them and let them. Truly, Allah likes those who do good”

How did Islam perceive about this holding grudge thing? Moreover, the point of giving forgiveness is not to let the grudge following you. Here we have 5 points of view about holding a grudge in Islam based on the Quran.

1. Grudge Affect the Mental Health

How many grudges you can hold in your heart? Only one grudge can make your health down. Imagine if you have a lot of grudges you keep holding on. The worst part of it is that it will affect your mental health into anxiety and depression. This means while we keep the grudge on us will harm you and this kind of disaster caused by self sin.

Allah doesn’t love to whoever that harm themselves. That is why the Quran already mentions letting the grudge away and giving forgiveness to others. It is better to do a good deed and avoid the bad deeds in Ramadhan. In the Quran surah, Al Jasiyah verse 23 mentions about this.

اَفَرَءَيْتَ مَنِ اتَّخَذَ اِلٰهَهٗ هَوٰىهُ وَاَضَلَّهُ اللّٰهُ عَلٰى عِلْمٍ وَّخَتَمَ عَلٰى سَمْعِهٖ وَقَلْبِهٖ وَجَعَلَ عَلٰى بَصَرِهٖ غِشٰوَةًۗ فَمَنْ يَّهْدِيْهِ مِنْۢ بَعْدِ اللّٰهِ ۗ اَفَلَا تَذَكَّرُوْنَ – ٢٣

“So have you ever seen the person who made his lust as his god and Allah let him go astray with His knowledge, and God has locked his ears and heart and put a lid on his sight? Then who is able to give him instructions after Allah (let him be misled?) Why don’t you take lessons?”

2. Grudge Turn Your Immune System Down

Since the grudge keeps banging on our head it will not only cause the mental health down but also the immune system. By feeling grudge you will not only be feeling hurt but also sad at the same time. That is why the best way to do is resentment the grudge by giving forgiveness.

Forgiving others make you feel relieved and in a happy condition. It will make the body produces the serotonin hormone and raise your immune system again. We should wiser to choose how to behave to keep the good immune to our body such as how to collect good deeds in Ramadhan. In the Quran surah, Ali Imron verse 110 mentions this.

كُنْتُمْ خَيْرَ اُمَّةٍ اُخْرِجَتْ لِلنَّاسِ تَأْمُرُوْنَ بِالْمَعْرُوْفِ وَتَنْهَوْنَ عَنِ الْمُنْكَرِ وَتُؤْمِنُوْنَ بِاللّٰهِ ۗ ١١٠

“You (Muslims) are the best people who were born for humans, (because you) command (do) what is right, and prevent them from breaking up, and having faith in Allah.”

3. The Main Problem in Holding Grudge

We need to get overlook into ourselves to know what makes us hold the grudge. Sometimes we mad at our parents, siblings, or friends. Then without knowing the truth, we bring the grudge until we have grown up.

As the heartbreaking continues, it will destroy our relationship with others. And yes, the main problem of holding a grudge is that destroys the relationship. That is why we need to let it go and make a good deed instead of a bad one. In the Quran surah An Nahl verse 97 mention about this.

مَنْ عَمِلَ صَالِحًا مِّنْ ذَكَرٍ اَوْ اُنْثٰى وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ فَلَنُحْيِيَنَّهٗ حَيٰوةً طَيِّبَةًۚ وَلَنَجْزِيَنَّهُمْ اَجْرَهُمْ بِاَحْسَنِ مَا كَانُوْا يَعْمَلُوْنَ – ٩٧

“Whoever works in virtue, both men and women in a state of faith will surely give him a good life and we will reward him with a reward that is better than what they have done.”

4. Lack of Confidence

Holding grudge makes us have a lack of confidence. This part should be avoided for all of us since Islam taught us to be a confident person. As the grudge in ourselves still on the wrong side, we will always be overthinking in every situation. It may harm you the most because it will cause some anxiety symptoms. That is why we need to avoid grudge feeling.

In the Quran surah, Al Jasiyah verse 21 mentions about this.

اَمْ حَسِبَ الَّذِيْنَ اجْتَرَحُوا السَّيِّاٰتِ اَنْ نَّجْعَلَهُمْ كَالَّذِيْنَ اٰمَنُوْا وَعَمِلُوا الصّٰلِحٰتِ سَوَاۤءً مَّحْيَاهُمْ وَمَمَاتُهُمْ ۗسَاۤءَ مَا يَحْكُمُوْنَ ࣖࣖ – ٢١

“Do those who commit crimes think that We will treat them like those who believe and do good, that is, the same in their lives and deaths? How bad their judgment is”

5. Grudge Destroy the Faith

Holding grudge makes the longest way to reach gratitude from Allah. It will make us being far away from Allah. The worst part is that we become an unfaithful person by keeping holding the grudge. And, yes… We don’t want to have characteristics of unbelievers in Islam. That is why we need to let the grudge go because it has dangerous effects.

Besides, Allah doesn’t love people that have an unforgivable feeling to others. Allah always remains us in the Quran to keep a good relationship with others. Moreover, there will always a cure in the Quran as the effect of holding a grudge for our hearts. That is why we need to keep our faith towards Allah as the reasons why the Quran has all life answers.

In the Quran Surah Yunus verse 57 mentions that:

يٰٓاَيُّهَا النَّاسُ قَدْ جَاۤءَتْكُمْ مَّوْعِظَةٌ مِّنْ رَّبِّكُمْ وَشِفَاۤءٌ لِّمَا فِى الصُّدُوْرِۙ وَهُدًى وَّرَحْمَةٌ لِّلْمُؤْمِنِيْنَ – ٥٧

“O, people! Indeed, you have learned a lesson (the Qur’an) from your Lord, a cure for a disease in the chest and guidance and mercy for a believer.”

These are 5 ways on how Islam sees if we keep holding the grudge which has so many effects. That is why the best thing to do is to resentment the feeling. Before we forgive others, it would be better if we forgive ourselves first. That thing will make it easier to forgive others.