8 Tips of Anger Management in Islam
Anger management in Islam teaches most moslems (and for common people) to handle the anger tamper in order not to turn the massive anger emotions. It is normally that human has an anger tamper arised when there is something either displeased or things trigger the tamper. However, human should control the emotion in order it could not be harmful for either theirselves or others. Uncontrolled anger can even create prolonged conflict.
According to Abu Hurairah (may Allah be please upon him) narrated about how the prophet handle anger:
“A man said to Prophet Mohammed (PBUH), “Advise me” He replied, “Do not become angry”. The man repeated his request several times, but the Prophet (PBUH) kept saying “Do not become angry” (Sahih al-Bukhari).
There are some anger management in Islam as Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) described about how to cure the tamper and ways to limit the effects of anger.
1. Seeking Refuge with Allah
Human as naturally has an animal instinct which sometimes they get angry and feeling hate toward others, but the anger uncontrollable. It is probably the Shaitan (devil) manipulate and spread the hatred toward the man and make the human uncivilised.
Reported by Sulaiman ibn Sard (R.A), Prophet Mohammed had advised two quarreling men:
“I was sitting with the prophet (pbuh) and two men slandering each other. One of them had a reddish face with the veins on his neck were standing out. The prophet (PBUH) said, ‘I know a word which if he say it, what he feels would go away. Just saying -a’uzu billahi min ashaitani rajiim (I seek refuge with Allah from Shaytan), what he feels (of the anger) would go away‘”
In other words, if a human feels the anger would be uncontrolable, then immediately saying a refuge with Allah from any Shaitan’s manipulation and temptation.
2. Be Calm and Relax (silent)
Even Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) when he was angry towards his wife, he remained silent rather than burst out of all the tamper. It is reported by Imaam Ahmad, al-Musnad, 1/ 329; see also Saheeh al-Jaami’, 693, 4027)
“Teach others and make things easy and do not make things difficult. If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent“
Other the Prophet’s quote about anger management as reported by Abu Huraira:
“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him speak goodness or be silent; and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his neighbor; and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his guest“
They conclude that it is better to speak wisely (speak goodness) or remain silent when someone thinks that his/her words triggered by anger. It will save if someone keep silent when they have to be silent.
3. Change position and start ablution
As narrated by Ahmed and Abu Dawood, The prophet Mohammed (PBUH) said:
“If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away, if it does not go away, let lie down“
Why he should sit down then lie down? Because a person lying down cannot perform the rage act as it limited by his motion.
It would be better if the one who is angry do ablution (wudlu) for the water can calming down the tamper since it is imitate as the water. As Prophet Mohammed said,
“Anger is from Shaitan, Shaitan is from fire, and Fire is turn out by water. So then when one is angry, do ablution (wudu)“
4. Remember the promise from Allah SWT
Those who can keep away from the anger and dealing with self control, Allah promise a great reward. One of the hadith reported by Al-Tabaraani:
“Whoever control his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allah will fill his heart with contentment on the Day of Ressurection”
Another hadith of Prophet Mohammed words (PBUH) as reported by Abbo Dawod and others.
“Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allah will call him before all of mankind on the Day of Resurrection, and will let him choose of the Hoor al-‘Ayn (the fair women live in jannah) whoever he wants“
5. Remember the Sunnah (of The Prophet attitude)
Our prophet Mohammed (PBUH) is the example of perfect man for all Moslem in the world. Although he is the leader, he was not getting angry unless something that for the sake of Allah or something that displeased Allah.
One of the naration reported Anas:
“I was walking with the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and he was wearing Najraanee (one of the region in Saudi Arabia) cloack. A Bedouin came and and seized the cloack roughly by the edge of his cloack, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the Bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allah that he had. The Prophet (PBUH) turned to the Bedouin and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something”
The story shows that what a very patient our Prophet was, because of his anger management and self-control.
6. Remember the Effects of Anger
Since anger is powerful emotion, if it is not control properly, then it will destructive to surrounded. Uncontrolable anger leads to aguments, physical fight, physical abuse, assault, and self-harmful. It is as well effect to the long time health problems such as:
- Trigger Anxiety Disorder.
- Abdominal pain.
- High blood pressure.
- Heart attack.
7. Remember that Allah is the Almighty
As in hadith which narrated by Abdullah Ibn Umar, the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said:
“No one has swallowed back anything more excellent in the sight of Allah, Who is Great and Glorious, than anger he restrains, seeking to please Allah most high” (Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi).
Another hadith narrated by Muslim, tell that a companion of Prophet Mohammed (PBUH), named Abu Mas’ood Al Badri said
“One day I was hitting my slave with whip, then I heard a voice (warning voice) behind me, ‘You should know, Abu Mas’ood!’ Despite, I did not identify the voice as I surrounded with anger until the voice get closer. I found out that it was Prophet Mohammed (PBUH), and he kept saying ‘You should know, Abu Mas’ood! You should know!’ Then, I threw away the whip and heard the Prophet said “You should know Abu Mas’ood, that Allah is mightier than you to hit you more than you do on this boy’, I replied that I would never hit him again. The the Prophet said if he did not do just that, then I would have been touched by the fire of hell“
8. Recitation (Dua)
The next discussion for anger management in Islam is perform recitation (Dua). As religious persons, moslems must perform recitation in any occassion especially when perform obligatory prayer (salat al- fardh). When moslems perform dua, they seek the refuge to Allah from any manipulation of Shaitan (the devil). In the first point of anger management in Islam, to calm the anger we should say audhu billahi mina ashaitaani rajeem.
Other dua when a moslem is in anger:
“Allahumma innee a’udhu bika min hamazaati ash-shaiaatin; wa a’udhu bika rabbi an yahdhuruune“
“O Allah, I seek refuge in You from the whisperings of devils; and I seek refuge in You from their presence around me”
It is as well simply recitation when you are feeling insecure and need for Allah protection, just recite the following tasbeeh :
“Subhaana Allah, wa alhamdulillah, wa laa ilaha illa Allah, wa laa hawla wa laa quwwata illa bi-llah“
“Sublime is Allah, and praise be to Allah, and there is no God but Allah, and there is no power or strenght except by the will of Allah”
Recite this dua everytime after finish the salat as well whenever it needed.
In order to have patience and get rid the anger, recite the following doa from ayah Quran 2:153 (Al Baqara):
“Yaa ayyuhalladziina aamanus ta’iinuu bis sabri was salaati. Inna allaaha ma’asaabriin”
“O you who believe! Seek help in patience and As-Salat. Truly, Allah is with the Saabiriin ( the one who is patient)”
As it is natural by human that has anger whenever they have in discomfort situation, even when a person look calmly, they should manage their emotion and anger wisely. Moreover to those who has a bad tamper and easily trigerred the anger, so that the one especially a moslem should perform the anger management poin as mentioned above.
Thus, the article for anger management in Islam. Hopefully, it would have any benefit to most moslems.