A dating concept is getting to know each other. However, in society, dating becomes a culture to deeper meaning more than getting to know each other concepts. In most cultures, dating involving an intimate relationship such as holding hands, kissing, touching, sex, and so on. How Islam face these realities?
Islam taught us that these dating styles above do not apply to Muslims. These dating styles above are about unlawful sexual intercourse in Islam and could be a marriage without parents’ blessing. On the Quran surah, Al Isra verse 32 mentions that we should avoid that kind of behavior.
وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنٰىٓ اِنَّهٗ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً ۗوَسَاۤءَ سَبِيْلًا - ٣٢
“And do not approach adultery; (adultery) is really a heinous act and a bad way.” (QS 17:32)
Based on that verse, then dating in youth Muslim becomes a halal dating concept in Islamic culture. This kind of dating will be held by arrangements from family members, friends, or neighbors.
Halal dating becomes popular because it is lawful and compatible with Islamic commandments. Halal dating becomes some things to look for in marriage Islam since a long time ago.
Here we have 5 things important in halal dating which allows the Islamic commandments based on the Quran in the way of how to find a spouse in Islam.
1. Good Commitment
A good commitment comes not only from the young men who want to find his future wife but also from the young girl. Both of them have a good commitment that their dating always keeps on Islamic rules.
For example, while they go on a date, it should be someone other than them to accompany their date.
In the Quran surah, Al Maidah verse 5 mentions that Muslims should keep maintaining their honor until marriage time.
ۖوَالْمُحْصَنٰتُ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنٰتِ وَالْمُحْصَنٰتُ مِنَ الَّذِيْنَ اُوْتُوا الْكِتٰبَ مِنْ قَبْلِكُمْ اِذَآ اٰتَيْتُمُوْهُنَّ اُجُوْرَهُنَّ مُحْصِنِيْنَ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحِيْنَ وَلَا مُتَّخِذِيْٓ اَخْدَانٍۗ
“… And (it is permissible for you to marry) women who maintain the honor of women who believe and women who maintain the honor of those who are given the book before you, if you pay their dowry to marry her, not with the intention of adultery and not to make domestic women…” (QS 5:5)
2. Avoid a Secret Relationship
Even though your dating is halal dating, it does not mean you are allowed to keep it secret. It’s not only will harm you but also does not apply in Islamic rule.
That is why, you need to tell your parents, friends, or family member that you’re dating someone in a halal way.
In the Quran surah Al Baqarah verse 235 mentions that:
وَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ فِيْمَا عَرَّضْتُمْ بِهٖ مِنْ خِطْبَةِ النِّسَاۤءِ اَوْ اَكْنَنْتُمْ فِيْٓ اَنْفُسِكُمْ ۗ عَلِمَ اللّٰهُ اَنَّكُمْ سَتَذْكُرُوْنَهُنَّ وَلٰكِنْ لَّا تُوَاعِدُوْهُنَّ سِرًّا اِلَّآ اَنْ تَقُوْلُوْا قَوْلًا مَّعْرُوْفًا ەۗ وَلَا تَعْزِمُوْا عُقْدَةَ النِّكَاحِ حَتّٰى يَبْلُغَ الْكِتٰبُ اَجَلَهٗ ۗوَاعْلَمُوْٓا اَنَّ اللّٰهَ يَعْلَمُ مَا فِيْٓ اَنْفُسِكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوْهُ ۚوَاعْلَمُوْٓا اَنَّ اللّٰهَ غَفُوْرٌ حَلِيْمٌ ࣖ - ٢٣٥
“And there is no sin for you to propose those women with innuendo or you hide (your desire) in your heart. God knows that you will mention them. But don’t make an agreement (to get married) with them in secret, except to say good words. And do not you set a marriage contract, before the end of his birthday. Know that God knows what is in your heart, so fear Him. And know that Allah is Forgiving, Most Gracious.” (QS 2:235)
3. Keep Your Sight
In Islam, while dating it’s important to keep your sight. It is a good behavior to keep our eyes from unlawful things. With our sight on, we can look so many things include overall women or men’s body from top to toe. We have no idea what we are thinking when saw them.
In the Quran surah, An-Nur verse 30 mentions that:
قُلْ لِّلْمُؤْمِنِيْنَ يَغُضُّوْا مِنْ اَبْصَارِهِمْ وَيَحْفَظُوْا فُرُوْجَهُمْۗ ذٰلِكَ اَزْكٰى لَهُمْۗ اِنَّ اللّٰهَ خَبِيْرٌۢ بِمَا يَصْنَعُوْنَ - ٣٠
“Say to men who believe, so that they believe his views, and remember his killing; that is, more sacred to them. Truly, Allah is All-Knowing what they do.” (QS 24:30)
4. Maintain Your Genital
The point of halal dating is to avoid adultery. Islam taught us that adultery is forbidden. That is why every Muslim needs to keep maintain their genital among the people except their spouse as the importance of virginity in Islam.
In the Quran surah, Al Ma’arij verses 29-30 mentions that:
وَّالَّذِيْنَ هُمْ لِفُرُوْجِهِمْ حٰفِظُوْنَۙ – ٢٩ اِلَّا عَلٰٓى اَزْوَاجِهِمْ اَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ اَيْمَانُهُمْ فَاِنَّهُمْ غَيْرُ مَلُوْمِيْنَۚ - ٣٠
“and those who care for their genitals, except for their wives or slaves they have, they are indeed not blameworthy.” (QS 70: 29-30)
5. Put Your Trust in Allah Only
For some people, halal dating may not their things and feel awkward to look. But, instead of worrying about what people taught on your relationship, keep doing a good deed is more important to do.
Besides, Allah loves them who keep their way in an Islamic way and put their trust in Allah only. May Allah blessed you to get some ways on how to get husband love in Islam.
For them who believed, in the Quran surah Ar-Rum verse 21 mentions that:
وَمِنْ اٰيٰتِهٖٓ اَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِّنْ اَنْفُسِكُمْ اَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوْٓا اِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَّوَدَّةً وَّرَحْمَةً ۗاِنَّ فِيْ ذٰلِكَ لَاٰيٰتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَّتَفَكَّرُوْنَ - ٢١
“And among His signs (greatness) is that He created pairs for you of your own kind so that you can use peaceful tents, and He makes among you gratitude and love. Really, in that, there really are signs (the greatness of God) for people who think.” (QS 30:21)
After reading the glance above, now you know that halal dating is lawful for you. Besides, it running in an Islamic way so can try this halal dating method. May Allah blessed you.