Living in this world, surrounded by other people, it is important for us to realize how necessary it is socializing with others. There are so many ways to socialize with other people, like making friend. Read more about importance of friendship in islam) or by holding gathering.
Actually, gathering is familiar in Islam. There are two types of gathering in which we might hold it, the first one is the public, and the second one is the private. Usually, public gathering is a kind of gathering held in public places like mosques or halls. On the other hand, private gathering is a kind of gathering held in the private places, and usually held because of some exact purposes. Our Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah may be upon him) has told his people to know how important it is holding gatherings.
“When a group of people assemble for the remembrance of Allah, the angels surround them (with their wings), (Allah’s) mercy envelops them, Sakinah, or tranquility descends upon them and Allah makes a mention of them before those who are near Him.” (Muslim).
Realizing the importance of gathering in islam, now we are going to find out what we have to do and what we have not to do while holding gatherings in Islam. These are the following:
- Ask for The Permission, Don’t Enter Without Being Welcome!
It is very impolite to enter the house of people without their permission even though they have invited you at once. Allah has told us in the Qur’an:
“O you who have believed, do not enter houses other than your own houses until you ascertain welcome.” (Qur’an, 24:27).
Our Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah may be upon him) also has told us that we have at least three chance to find out whether someone permits us or not. It is clearly told in the hadith below:
“Permission should asked for three times; if you were given permission (then enter). Otherwise, go back.” (Musnad Ahamad).
Read more : Ways to do Sabr in Islam
2. Give Other Salaam Before and After The Gathering
Giving and replying Salaam is one of adab or etiquette in Islam that we must perform. It is clearly told in the hadith below:
“The Muslim has five rights over his fellow-Muslim: he should return his salaams, visit him when he is sick, attend his funeral, accept his invitation, and pray for mercy for him when he sneezes” (Bukhari)
However, giving salaam when we enter and exit the gathering is important. It is actually rewarded by righteousness and peace. Our Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah may be upon him) also said:
“When one of you comes to a gathering, let him say Salam (greetings), and when he wants to leave let him say Salam, for the former is not more of a duty than the latter.” (Abu Dawud).
read also: importance of greetings in islam
3. Don’t Occupy So Many Spaces, Give Other The Rest!
No matter how crowded the gatherings might be, we must be willing to give some spaces to other for sitting. Giving other some spaces can be the way of welcoming them. Allah has instructed us to give enough room for others in the Qur’an:
“O you who believe! When you are told to make room in the assemblies, (spread out and) make room. Allah will give you (ample) room (from His Mercy).” (Qur’an, 58:11).
4. It’s Impolite to Ask Someone Giving Up His/Her Place
Asking someone to give up his/her place for you or anyone else is not a proper thing to do. If someone sits in a particular spot, the spot will always be his/her right in the first place. How could we solve the problem of limited spots? Just sincerely make sure and try hard to give some spaces for newcomers. Believe it, there will always be the way!
“If one of you gets up from his spot and then comes back to it, he has more right to it.”(Muslim).
Read more: Importance of Gratitude in Islam
5. Don’t Sit in The Middle of Circle!
One thing you must avoid while you’re on the gathering is avoiding sitting in the circle no matter how crowded it is! Sitting in the circle will only distract the gathering and making other participants lose their focus. The hadith below told us:
“Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) cursed the one who sits in the middle of the circle.” (Abu Dauwd).
6. Don’t Sit Between Two People Without Their Permission!
“It is not permissible for a man to come between two others, except with their permission.”(Abu Dauwd)
The hadith above told us the importance of avoiding sitting between two people without permission. Whenever we come to the gathering, no matter how difficult it is looking for a spot to sit, just ask other people if you want to sit between them. What’s so difficult about asking?
7. If There’s a Third Person Near You, Avoid Talking Secretively
Talking secretively while we are near other people may offend or exclude them from the gathering. It is so bad being excluded, isn’t? Our Prophet has instructed us not to do so in the hadith below:
“When there are three of you, then let two not converse in exclusion of their companion or the third, for indeed that will worry him.” (At-Tirmidhi).
8. Let’s Mention The Name of Allah
Mentioning the name of Allah may bring us mercy and peace. Having gatherings without the remembrance of Allah and The Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah may be upon him) is so harmful. Because it is a form of sending our gratitude the God as the Creator of the world. The Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah may be upon him) once said:
“No group gathers in a sitting in which they do not remember Allah, nor send peace and blessings upon their Prophet (PBUH), except it will be a source of remorse for them. If He Wills, He will punish them, and if He Wills, He will forgive them.” (At-Tirmidhi).
Read more: How to be Closer to Allah SWT
9. Make Sure of Your Cleanliness While Attending Gathering
Imagine, how awful it is staying longer sitting beside the one who discomforts you with his/her odors or any other form of uncleanliness? If we already have such a realization, we must know the importance to keep our cleanliness. Remember, cleanliness is also a part of faith. Allah has told us so:
“Truly, God loves those who turn unto Him in repentance and loves those who purify themselves.” (Quran 2:222)
Read more: Cleanliness in Islam
10. Don’t Sit on The Roads!
It is important to avoid sitting on the roads because it will make people difficult to walk entering and leaving the gathering. Our Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah) instructed in the hadith below:
“Beware! Avoid sitting on the roads (ways).” (Al-Bukhari)
Besides those 10 things we must know while having gatherings, these are 5 following things you should know:
- Pay so much attention for anyone who is talking
- Use direct language and limit the words as necessary as we could
- Praise Allah after finishing the Gathering
- Try not to offend others by our words
- Welcome the newcomers wholeheartedly
After all, it might be a bit difficult to implement one by one point we’ve found out above. Yet at least, no matter how difficult it it, just try you best! May Allah bless us with peace and mercy as always!