According to the traditions in several regions, such as Asia and Africa, in laws has particular rights. Daughter in laws is expected to serve her husband’s family, especially his mother. Although there is no certain law about the in laws, the traditions remain strong even until today. Which makes us have to fully understand what are the actual rights of in laws in Islam, as written below.
1. Obedient to In laws is Kindness to the Husband
A Muslim woman who got married is not obliged to serve the family of her husband. But if she did so, under the name of Allah, it is considered as a form of kindness to the husband. Allah SWT would also appreciated. If the husband’s family or the husband himself notice that a woman do something that not obligated, it could elevate her status in her eyes. Even though it’s not something obligatory, doing such things gained many blessings. Also read Rights of a Woman in Islam During a Divorce
2. In Laws Have No Rights to Tell What to Do
A daughter in law has a full right in deciding to do anything she wants to. The in laws have no right to drive her to do anything, especially when she doesn’t want to. Including her daily life like the food to cook or the clothes to wear everyday. It is the full right of a daughter in law, and only her husband can suggest her something like that. Also read Rights of Teachers in Islam
3. In Laws Have No Rights to Interfere Your Life
It is never right for the in laws to meddling the life of a daughter in laws and her husband. Only the wife and husband could interfere in each other’s life, and only the husband can tell a woman what to do. But if the in laws are trying to persuade the husband to command on his wife, then she has to be obedient. Also read Labor Rights in Islam
4. A Woman Should Not Ask Permission from Her In Laws
If a woman wants to do something, she doesn’t have to tell her in laws, let alone asks for their permission. As the in laws have no absolute rights in her life. It’s the permission of the husband that she needs, and that is what important. If she wants to visit her family, she doesn’t need to tell her in laws in advance. As long as the husband gives her permission, she can temporarily leaves the house. Also read Rights of Transgenders in Islam
5. In Laws Have No Rights to Know Any Private Matters
No in laws is supposed to know any private matters of the daughter in laws and anything regarding her husband. Also, the in laws should not be curious of what might happen between the couple. When a couple have a rift in their relationship and everything is not going well, they shouldn’t have told anyone about that. They have to try their best to keep it secrets from both family. Also read Funeral Rights in Islam
6. A Woman is Not Obliged to Live Together with Her In Laws
No laws or traditions ever make it compulsory for a woman to live with their in laws after the marriage. She has the full right to live on her own with her husband and children only. By living separately with the in laws, it is minimizing the conflict that might happen between a woman and her in laws. Even though the in laws is persuading the husband to live with the together, a woman has the right to reject it through her husband. Also read Rights of Travelers in Islam
7. A Woman Should Respects Her In Laws
Even though the in laws never have the right to direct her life or driving a woman of what she should do, doesn’t mean she can be disrespectful towards them. However, the in laws in people whom her husband love, and they are her husband’s family before her. She ought to respects her husband’s family to show her love for her husband. It will do many good for her after all. Also read The Rights of Neighbours in Islam
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8. In Laws is Allowed to Live Together
If a newlywed couple is not well off enough yet and unable to buy house on their own, they are allowed to live together with the in laws. In return, the daughter in law should help with the house chores although she is not obliged. It is a form of gratitude and with the light heart of love toward her new family. Also read Importance of Family Life in Islam
9. In Laws Have No Rights to Command Someone
In a situation where in laws are living altogether, they don’t have the right to command the life of daughter in law. It remains the absolute right of the husband and they shouldn’t interfere with it at all. Also read Importance of Health in Islam
10. A Woman Should Not Touch In Laws Who are Not Her Mahrams
A woman should protect her dignity in front of her in laws. She should not appear without hijab in front of in laws who are not her mahrams, such as her husband’s brother or his uncles. Also read Importance of Female Education in Islam
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Tips for a Muslim Woman about the In laws
- After marriage, learn about the rights we have upon the in laws and how we should behave toward them.
- Also learn about the right of the in laws, including who is our mahram and who is not. Learn from how Prophet Muhammad (SAW) treats his wives.
- Our in laws has a strong position as inmates (if you live together) and also as neighbors (if you live next door).
- Learn cooking from the mother in laws, as she is the one who raised our husband.
- Master child rearing also from our mother in laws.
- Forgive the mistake of your in laws when something bad happens.
- Don’t be defensive if you go opposite ways with your in laws.
- Protect your husband from his mother, and his mother from your husband.
- Be the bridge between your husband and your in laws.
- Never talk bad about your husband or in laws to other person.
So those are all the rights of in laws in Islam. After reading all of those, hopefully we understand better about the rights of in laws as the reference to our daily lives.