Humans are social creatures who can not live alone and need each other. But it sometimes causes some sparks of trouble from misunderstanding or a mistake that was done by one person and made others emotional and angry.
Islam is a religion that glorifying peace and very recommends to solve problems well. So that, this article will specifically discuss about how to deal with angry person in Islam. Please see and hopefully it can be an enlightenment for all readers.
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- Control yourself and do not be emotional
The most basic to deal with angry person is controlling our emotions. So that, we do not be ignited by emotions. Because if we participated to ignite emotions, it can cause ‘slander’ or quarrels that do not benefit any parts, but it will harm all of parts. You may also read ways to control anger in Islam
- Give a chance to talk and calm down his angry first
An angry person needs times to talk and he must be heard first until he feels calm or tired to vent his anger. So that, his anger will be calm down on his own. After that, we start to speak peacefully. Interrupting and forcing him to speak while he was angry, will only make situation worse.
- Look from many perspectives (understand your collocutor)
Facing an angry person can not be done by scolding him back, it will the situation worse. Try to understand the causes and feelings of our angry collocutor then try to speak peacefully with considering the psychological of that person.
- Help to calm down the anger
You can do many things to calm down someone who is overcome by emotion and anger. It can be with verbal words or a touch hand to some body parts like holding hands, rubbing hands or rubbing the back, so that your collocutor will be more relax and slightly calm down his anger. You may also read ways to find peace for body and soul.
- Hold off your talks
If the condition does not improve, then hold off talks or activities that will be done because it will make the condition more chaotic.
- Give times to be alone
If it is difficult to solve an anger collocutor or an angry person, then you should let him alone, give him times to be alone and reflect what makes him emotional. But do not forget to say that we will always be there if he wants to talk and share about his difficulties. If we leave him immediately without leaving a message at all, it will make the situation worse, even it will be worse your relationship that has been established with you guys. You may also read how to meditate in Islam.
7. Apologize if his anger triggers is us
Admitting mistakes is not easy, even apologizing for our mistakes is difficult, too. But it is the best solution to face an angry person whose his anger is from us. Precisely, if we do not realize, do not want to admit mistakes and apologize, it will make the situation worse.
Even if we are not wrong, but we are still confused with the causes from our collocutor anger, then invite him to do self introspection and apologize if the cause of anger is a mistake that we have done. For example with saying, “I may be wrong, let’s see and fix it together”.
- Ask for a chance to speak
Beside we have to calm down and give chance to our collocutor, we have to try to control the situation if the problem drags and disturb the deadline to finish a job. So that, we should be able to assess and control the situation especially if our collocutor was not looked to reduce his anger. Try to grab his attention and ask for a chance to speak peacefully.
You can cut off conversation that have been out of the discussion, so he realizes that his emotional acts are not true. But do it with the right way and the right time, so that our collocutor is no more angry and offended.
- Use the right words
The selection of right words is very important in every words that comes out from our mouth. It will affect our collocutor emotions. Show to him that we have heard and understood his problems, then offer him to both examine that problem and find the best solution to face the problem with more mature and civilized ways, so that problem can finish quickly and it does not cause new problems.
- Give explanation
If our collocutor has looked calmer and eased his emotions, then we can give him explanation about what we want to say to him. Give a clear and simple explanation, so that our collocutor can be more understand our intentions. [AdSense-C]
- Speak sitting down
Do not speak in standing position especially if our collocutor were angry. Other than it is inappropriate and unethical, it will make the situation worse.
Speak sitting down in a comfortable seat, so the body and mood will be more relax. In Islam, it suggests that the best way to control anger is sitting if you were standing, then lay down your body if you were sitting, then take ablution water if you were laying down, then pray if you were sitting, laying down and taking ablution water can not reduce your anger.
As The Prophet said,
“If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down.” (Imam Ahmed)
”Anger comes from Satan, Satan was created from fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when any of you is angry, he should perform ablution.” (Abu Dawood)
You can also tell that angry person to make dua if he can not control his anger.
“Ya Ayyu Halladziina Amanusta’inu Bishabri Washshalati Innallaha Ma’ashshabiriina”
“O you who believed, Seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.” (Al-Baqarah : 153)
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Thus this article about how to deal with angry person in Islam. Hopefully the discussion of this article can add our treasury of sciences and improve our faith all. Amen. [AdSense-C]