10 Rights of Elders in Islam – Obligations

Review by : Yuli SE., MM

As a human being, we are obliged to caring and treating the elderly very well. Islam has given the right to parents in the Qur’an letter Luqman verse 14:

‘And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.’

There is amount of elderly rights in Islam, which will be elaborated in the next paragraph.

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1. Rights to Respect Them

It is right that we as younger people give a genuine respect from the heart to the elderly. Implicitly, this right appears in the hadith of Tirmidhi no. 1842 :

‘Has told us [Muhammad bin Marzuq Al Bashari], has told us [Ubaid bin Waqid] from [Zabri] he said, I heard [Anas bin Malik] said; An old man came to the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wasallam then people slow down to expand the way for him, then the Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu’ alaihi wasallam said: “Not including from our group people who do not love our little children and do not respect our parents (adults).“

In this hadith there is a sentence that is great and contains a high meaning; that the old man is honored, until this will take his heart and please his soul. Because, the old people deserve to be respected. The meaning of “honoring the old man” is in your heart there is a sense of respect and glorification of them, you know its position; and this is one of the rights of their rights.

There are many ways to respect them, and we will mentioned it some sort of them. First, always be respectful to the elderly. Even though they are old enough and may not be healthy anymore, they remain people who have emotions and ideas.

Second, do not judge them from physical condition. Aging is just part of the natural cycle: You are born, become a child, grow into a teenager, an adult, and one day you will also be old. Have respect for them and their lives. Third, do not swear or say words they may find inappropriate; because they were raised in different eras, they may not be able to accept it with a light heart.

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2. The right to glorify parents

The second right is to glorify them. It means glorifying it by splitting a call to them, saving them how to get along with them, and showing love to them. This is mentioned in Hadith from Abu Dawud no. 4843 :

‘Indeed, including the glorification of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala, ie glorifying the Muslim parent, the man who memorized the Qur’an without exaggeration or loosened in it and glorified the just ruler.’

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3. Rights to received a better treatment

Next rights is receiving an appropriate treatment. The most important part in caring for the elderly is to love them and keep them active. There are many ways to care for the elderly, either by taking care in the comfort of their own home, taking them to your home or moving them to a nursing home. By providing time and a little hard work, you can care for loved ones properly.

In some cases, the elderly needs a nurse to helps us for treatment. This will solve the physical difficulties in the care of your parents. Home nurses can help the elderly meet whatever they need and lift the burden of other family members. They can also help the elderly maintain their independence by keeping them at home.

Sometimes government assistance can help cover some of these costs. Take a look at some of your options and talk to local elderly agencies if they exist. If they do not need a house nurse or if the house nurse can not do their job, you should help them. For example, help them with tasks such as cleaning the house, washing, or taking care of the garden.

We can treat them in our house. Caring for parents at home can help them feel better and maintain strong family relationships while also allowing you to spend time with them and monitor their health. If you want to take care of the parents in your own home then you have to set the furniture to allow plenty of space to walk freely and lift loose carpet that can cause people to stumble. Home care means to help your parents bathe, dress, eat, manage medication, transportation, financial management and emotional support.

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4. Rights to exercise

[AdSense-A] The elderly have the right to remain active in all things. Physically, exercise can help protect the elderly from illness and reduce their functional age to 10 or 15 years. Exercise has also produced great health benefits for those who have been inactive for years. This can delay the need for care and keep them away from the disease for longer periods of time.

The elderly are advised to do 30 minutes of moderate activity (running, swimming, walking, cycling) five times per week. Those who perform more intense activities that make the heart rate rise significantly and breath heavier should exercise at least 20 minutes per day three days a week.

Weight-bearing exercise (using barbells, resistance bands or weight) should be done two or three times per week on a non-consecutive day. They should also exercise for flexibility (stretching, yoga, tai chi) for at least 10 minutes every day.

5. Rights to communicate

An elderly people needs to communicate with each other. Some younger people may mistakenly think they can not connect with the elderly, but remember that they also feel they can not connect with you or your interests.

Try opening your mind and find out what makes them happy. If you can not share your interests at least you can feel their joy. And by listening to their stories you may find them interesting and they can help you direct the problem or situation in your life. Parents have lifelong experiences to offer, you can learn and improve your own life by listening and engaging with them.

Find the beauty in their story and learn from the story. It will also deepen the connection between the two of you and can help them feel more connected to the world around them.

6. Rights to be visited

A visit to the elderly will provide an emotional connection and improve the mental state of your parents. Visits will also allow you to become a nurse to check their health and wellbeing. You can see if they are still watering the plants, opening letters or showing a bruise, all of which can signal that they need additional help. Asking friends and other family members also helps.

7. Rights to doing their activity

An elder people have a rights to do their activity. For example, drive your own car. Their idea to stop driving can cause a lot of anger and resentment for parents. Remember that the ability to drive a car is an important component in maintaining self-reliance and it can be hard to accept that they can no longer do it.

Sometimes there are courses offered for the elderly who can generate discount car insurance. If we are afraid something will happen, we can use a tool that helps the elderly drive a car, like a tool that helps the arthritic wrist to turn the ignition. If it is not safe and your parents continue to refuse then seek help from doctors or authorities to stop them from driving the car. Keep them on the go by using public transportation or tricycles so they can maintain a sense of independence and freedom.

8. Rights of praying

As a moslem, an elder people still have a rights to pray (such as shalat, dzikr, reciting Qur’an, etc). But regarding their condition, which is not as fit as they were young, they can do it in some condition. For example, if they are not strong enough to stand at shalat, they can sit in chair and keep doing shalat. This is done so that they feel involved in making decisions for themselves so that they feel more comfortable with the help.

However, this method may not be applicable for elderly people suffering from dementia, so further care should be taken.

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9. Rights to choose their own choice

At an advanced age, the elderly still have their own choices. For that, their personal choice should be asked. Perhaps they feel that they are losing their freedom and independence by asking for help so considering their desires is important. Ask them for options in terms of which family members or what type of services provide care. [AdSense-C]

Maybe you can not fulfill all their desires but it is important to listen and consider it. If your parents are having trouble understanding you, try simplifying your explanations and questions to help them understand.

10. Rights to get information as much as they can

Older people are usually no longer thinking about issues such as finance and others. However, we keep discussing it with our parents. Talk to your parents about their finances and insurance plans for long-term care. Sometimes you can apply for additional benefits to reduce heating bills or prescription fees and this should be identified if any. It might be better to save money by choosing affordable, elderly affordable residences if they want to stay at home.

However, the elderly are very vulnerable to fraud so make sure you talk about it and protect them. A credit check at least once a year also needs to be done to ensure that no one stole his/her identity.

Discussing legal matters is also permissible. For example, suppose to find out about the strength of their lawyers proxy documents, testament, and health care. This step will choose who can make medical decisions and financial decisions for your parents if there is an emergency or when in some ways they can not afford. If your parents have not got these documents yet, help them make them.

That was the rights of elder people in Islam. The most important is, we as their child or younger people, keep caring them but still aware about their needs and if they have their own decisions, we have to respect them. See you in the next article.

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