How to deal with unfair parents in Islam? Is it allow parents to do unfair to their children? What we as children must do with unfair parents? Well, below here there are the answers, what is the law of unfair parents, what should the children do when the parents do unfair and how parents must do fair to the children. Let’s see the 15 how to deal with unfair parents in Islam.
The meaning of fair in Islam
What exactly is fair in Islam? Fair in Islam means “equal” together in giving treatment and attitudes that we give to children, including giving gifts and deciding anything. Below here, Allah says in the Quran.
“Indeed, Allah commands you to render trusts to whom they are due and when you judge between people to judge with justice. Excellent is that which Allah instructs you. Indeed, Allah is ever Hearing and Seeing.”
- Fair is “balance”
Besides having the meaning of “equal” fair also has a balanced meaning. Like scales, as parents, we must be able to be balanced. We should give equal attention to our children.
By being balanced, hostility and jealousy will not occur among children. Well, do fair it must be done by leaders check out in here rules of leadership in Islam Next below here, Allah Almighty says in the Quran.
“O mankind, what has deceived you concerning your Lord, the Generous,7. Who created you, proportioned you, and balanced you?” (Verse 82:6-7)
2. Allah commands humans to do fair
In one verse of the Quran Allah Almighty has also commanded us as Muslims to be fair. Being fair, and doing good is one of the main obligations that Muslims must do. Below the following here, Allah says in the Quran.
“Indeed, Allah orders justice and good conduct and giving to relatives and forbids immorality and bad conduct and oppression. He admonishes you that perhaps you will be reminded.” (16:90)
3. Parents must be fair
Fairness also applies from how to pay attention to children and, how to love children, and praise our children. Being fair to children does not only focus on giving gifts. All of the parents’ attitudes toward their children should be fair. The following below here is the hadith.
“Be fair among your children in the grant, as you want them to be fair to you in loyalty and gentle.”
4. The command of Allah SWT
There is one more verse from the Quran about the command of Allah SWT against parents or Muslims who believe that do fair to children and anyone so that there is no hostility among you. Below here, Allah Almighty says in the Quran.
“O you who have believed, be persistently standing firm for Allah, witnesses in justice, and do not let the hatred of a people prevent you from being just. Be just; that is nearer to righteousness. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what you do.” (Verse 5:8)
5. The law of doing unfair in Islam
What is the law for parents or Muslims who do not apply fair? Surely Allah forbids us to do unfair things, and surely Allah will give the best feedback return to people who do not do the fair. What can a child do if a parents do unfair? Discuss this problem with your parents with an honest, say that parents should not do this unfair. Finish it and talk about this. [AdSense-B]
If your parents do not accept it, pray to Allah so that Allah will open the door of our parents’ hearts. Inshaallah, as time goes they will understand. Well, there are some ways on how to deal with controlling parents in Islam. Below here Allah says in the Quran.
“Indeed, Allah commands you to render trusts to whom they are due and when you judge between people to judge with justice. Excellent is that which Allah instructs you. Indeed, Allah is ever Hearing and Seeing.”(Verse 4:58)
6. The right deal
In a hadith the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) once said in his hadith, if parents give their children gifts, they must be given fairly and evenly. In addition, the prizes given may not exceed the requirements or better than others. Gifts may be given in different such as colors or shapes so that they cannot exchange. The following below is the hadith.
Indeed, I have given a gift in the form of a slave of mine to my son. “Then the Prophet Muhammad. said: “Do you give all your children like (your child) this?” He replied: “No.” Then the Prophet Muhammad. asked:
“Are you happy if they (your children) are all devoted to you with the same?” He replied: “I want (O Messenger of Allah).” Then the Prophet Muhammad. said: “Then don’t do it.” (Bukhari, Muslim, and Tirmidhi)
7. Allah SWT Almighty loves those who do the fair
Allah says in a verse of the Quran that He loves Muslims very much, especially parents who are fair to their children. For this reason, try to be a parent and act justly. Below here, Allah says in the Quran.
“….. Indeed, Allah loves those who act justly.” (Verse 49:9)
8. You will get much of benefits
What are the benefits of doing fair to fellow Muslims or towards children? The Prophet said in a hadith that Muslims who are fair will always get benefit by Allah SWT. The following below is the hadith.
“In fact, those who are fair in the sight of Allah will be on the shoulders of the light on their right, namely those who are just are those who are fair in making legal decisions and fair in taking legal decisions and being fair to something mandated to him.” (Muslim)
9. It could cause a fight
Why in Islam teaches parents to be fair to their children? If parents do unfair to their children, this will lead to fighting, and hatred among their children. In this hadith below, the Prophet SAW warn us three times about doing unfair.
“Be fair to your child, be fair to your child, be fair to your child!” (Abu Dawud, Nasa’i, and Ibn Hibban)
10. Bad prejudice and envy
Parents who do not unfair can cause hate, hostility, and jealousy among fellow children. The following below in the Quran has explained how the prophet Yusuf AS was banished in order to get the attention of his father, the Prophet Yaqub AS.
“Kill Joseph or cast him out to (another) land; the countenance of your father will (then) be only for you, and you will be after that a righteous people. Said a speaker among them, Do not kill Joseph but throw him into the bottom of the well; some travelers will pick him up – if you would do (something).” (Verse 12: 9-10)
11. The parents command to break Allah’s command
How the importance of obeying parents in Islam? It is must be done by children. However, what if parents give orders to children to break Allah’s command?
What should a child do? Do not follow the instructions of parents to do things that are not in the way of Allah. Do good to parents in the world, but never follow the wrong path they are shown to you. Below here, Allah says in the Quran.
“But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me (in repentance). Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.”
12. The prophet Joseph’s father
Have you ever heard the story of the Prophet Yaqub? The Prophet Yaqub AS is the father of the Prophet Joseph gave an example to parents, how to be fair to their children.
In a story, the father of Joseph’s prophet advised him not to talk about his dreams to his brothers. This lie may not be good, but this is a way to avoid jealousy, hate, and fights between the brothers of the Prophet Joseph. The following below has been said in the Quran.
“He said, “O my son, do not relate your vision to your brothers or they will contrive against you a plan. Indeed Satan, to man, is a manifest enemy. And thus will your Lord choose you and teach you the interpretation of narratives and complete His favor upon you and upon the family of Jacob, as He completed it upon your fathers before, Abraham and Isaac. Indeed, your Lord is Knowing and Wise.” (Verse12: 5-6) [AdSense-C]
13. How to educate children
What should parents do with their children to avoid jealousy from their brothers? Educate your child with Islamic knowledge. Educate them well, so that one day he can obey his parents in the future. Besides, as children we should respect our parents, please check on several Quran verses of respecting parents. Below here, Allah says in the Qur’an.
“And We have enjoined upon man (care) for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the (final) destination”.(31: 14)
14. Give children with a good education
There are some rights of parents in Islam, one of them is giving the children a good education. Well, complete your child with a good education, such as Islamic education. Communicate with children to avoid misunderstandings and avoid fights between them. Below here, Allah says in the Quran.
“And (mention, O Muhammad), when Luqman said to his son while he was instructing him, “O my son, do not associate [anything] with Allah. Indeed, association (with him) is a great injustice.”(Verse 31:13)
Hopefully, the 15 how to deal with unfair parents in Islam above could be useful for you. Make a deal with unfair parents are not easy. So, communicate is the best thing to do, explain it honestly, make all the things clear. Then, your parents will do fair amongst you. A child can certainly remind his parents if they forget.